What I want and what I need
In Bodhicharyavatara, Śāntideva mentions:
Since I and other beings both,
In wanting happiness, are equal and alike,
In fleeing suffering, are equal and alike,
However, not knowing the causes of happiness and of suffering, all the sentient beings are wandering in Samsara since the beginningless time.
I am not different either. I am one of them seeking happiness.
During this journey towards what I want, I forgot to ask myself if what I want is what I actually need. I engaged in whatever activities craving for what I want. I found happiness in serving others but forgetting that even suffering does exist, I suffered and I did not know why.
After all, what I need is the happiness that lasted forever. Not knowing what brings about such happiness, I was lost.
What brings about that happiness then? Practicing DHARMA.
What is DHARMA then?
During an annual retreat for the locals in Pharping, His Holiness Chökyi Nyima Rinpoche gave the much needed answer to that question.
Dharma is taming one’s mind and happiness is serving all the sentient beings until Buddhahood.
The moment those precious words were bestowed by Rinpoche-la; I realized, well, this is what I want and this is exactly what I need.
Rinpoche-la also mentioned about RYI located right at Ka-Nying Shedrub Ling Monastery providing Buddhist Studies to lay people. There, one can learn to train the mind to tame the mind into its purest form – the precious Buddha nature.
I gathered courage and went to Rinpoche-la with the sincere wish to study in RYI. The joy in Rinpoche-la’s face to see a local youth wanting to study Dharma radiated throughout the retreat hall. That joy touched me from inside, brought me immense happiness and encouragement to study the genuine Dharma.
These days, I feel blessed and extremely fortunate at RYI doing Buddhist Studies with the blend of academic systems and the monastic settings. Taking a step towards what I want and what I need.
~ Laxmi from Nepal